Wednesday, May 9, 2007

W 116 M

Introduction

Usually at the end of their second semester, the English major students of Janus Pannonius University face the Proficiency Test. Part of it is an essay, whose title contestants choose from 25 (5 times 5) possibilities.

In this research paper I analyse the reasons why the five worse Proficiency Test essays of 1997 at Janus Pannonius University could get such grades. I have chosen this topic because I’ve always been better at criticising others’ works than inventing something new or better myself. But I like doing it!

Method

The grading of Proficiency Test essays at Janus Pannonius University is based upon five aspects: focus, accuracy, vocabulary, paragraph organisation and essay organisation (and students should avoid exceeding the given length of 450 words). Two points can be gained for each. I had selected the five less appreciated essays from the year 1997, whose grading made an appearance of a binary sequence of numbers from computer language, meaning they had received only zeros and ones, thus all five were from the runners-up category.

Reading them I was counting the number of noticed and unnoticed mistakes, looking for comments from the two correctors, and trying to figure out why they had got those poor marks.

Results and Discussion

The first thing that attracted my attention was the big amount of mistakes, which I really wasn’t prepared to see (seems like I have my own ideas about the level of knowledge of English majors). I added the number of mistakes that had been unnoticed by both correctors to the number of errors they had corrected, so altogether I had 199 inaccuracies. This, when compared to the total number of words, let’s say 2500, tells us that about every twelfth word is incorrect, either in spelling or in syntax (I hope I will be able to surpass this with the help of spell-check).
There were very few times when I would disagree with the comments of the corrector. In one example, the text reads “the [Christmas] tree is decorated together with the children” (Code 89, page 2), and one of the correctors added “Really??” I think it cannot be judged, this custom varies from family to family, so this is a biased remark; just like the note on the cover of the work of Code 80, where one corrector warns the other: “… be prepared; this will be not easy to read at all.” I consider this a slight suggestion, which would inevitably affect the addressee when reading the essay. As for subjectivity, I have seen definitely less legible ones.

There were funny and less funnier mistakes, I’d like to refer to four of them (all have gone unnoticed). I guess it should be blamed on excitement that Code 60 wrote ‘day’ instead of ‘they’ (page 1, row 3), ‘ones’ instead of ‘once’, or the awkward “plam pudding” of Code 15 (pages 1 and 3), let alone the “greating cards” of Code 89 (page 1). Less amusing is Code 15 when writing “The average Hungarian family, who hasn’t got money for spend holiday in Húsvéti szigetek, stay at home and make happy their Christmas holiday.” (bottom of page 1). I would only point out the notion of “Húsvéti szigetek” here. Of course, it is “Húsvét-sziget” in Hungarian, singular and with a hyphen. Furthermore, above “szigetek” you can find “iseland” ruled out. Writer caught in two minds, mixing ‘island’ with ‘Iceland’?

That much about mistakes, now let’s move on to concreteness. Perhaps the most unlucky was Code 55 when stating “This paper will present what tricks girls use to catch boys.” I failed to find any description of real tricks, and in the conclusion she (at least presumably she) says: “The two most important ways to win are basically appearance, and behaviour.” Gee, I already know that, but these are no tricks! This casts a shadow on the focusing of the whole writing. However, this one has the fewest mistakes, only sixteen, and the comment goes like: “Needs a second chance to prove vocabulary and accuracy skills.”

Code 15 couldn’t avoid using ‘happy’ several times. Of course, this might be a keyword, but I don’t like cases “… and everybody is happy” or “…and they are happy” (page 2); they seem to be redundant and indecent. The writer does not give an impression of being too enthusiastic about the topic, or too enthusiastic about this whole Proficiency Test thing, or too enthusiastic about writing in English at all. This essay has the second largest amount of inaccuracies, that is forty-five.

Talking about enthusiasm, Code 89 seems to be too pathetic throughout the whole essay. I suppose the conclusion would tell enough: “Sitting in a warm chair by a fireplace, peacefuly looking at the ones I love the most, opening their presents and smiling happily, while outside it is snowing, would make a perfect Christmas.” This piece also has a high error rate with forty-three mistakes.

The essay of Code 80 is the most concrete to me. It really concentrates on and gives answers to the question “how”. The examples of the unwanted presents (page 2) and the Christmas dinner (page 2) are really concrete, and I think almost everyone can recall some events which relate to these issues. But the corrector, absolutely correctly, asks the rhetorical question: “Subtract points? It’s at least 800 words!”. As the limit is 450, this is right. Just the introduction could (or should) have been cut to half of its size. Besides, if we count with 29 mistakes in 800 words, it’s far better than the average.

The work of Code 60 seems to be falling apart. The writer, maybe just having a bad day, virtually failed to give a reasonable answer or a concept. The laconic comment is: “Most inaccurate.” In fact, it is The most inaccurate.

Conclusion

Taking a brief glance at the titles of these five essays my first thought obviously was that maybe Christmas had not been the best choice of last year’s topics. Knowing that the two selected essays for the Guidelines for Writing Theses in the English Department of JPU (latest version published in 1997), both have the title “How to survive a Hollywood movie” also supports this idea.

If I take these essays seriously (which I have to do), I am apt to say that some writers tend to forget the English language after gaining admittance to this university. Some mistakes are really embarrassing. I thought all university students have a certain level of knowledge, but this research has shown me that not all of them do. So this has been a kind of unpleasant experience to me.

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